Happy New Year!

Happy New Year 2014 timeline covers
Hope you had a fabulous and safe night celebrating into the new year with lots of drinks, friends and a special someone to kiss. I know I did. Not the kiss though, my life’s too boring.
But hunny, I can’t tell ya I wasn’t trying my best to snatch somebody up at the club though. I literally spent all day getting ready for last night.
First, my ass had to get the room looking presentable. I would’ve felt pretty shitty about myself, if I would’ve had to start the New Year livin’ in a pig sty, you know?! There’s no better time to start fresh than on a new day in a new year, and hunny lemme tell ya: There’s nothing fresh about a mess.
So I got up early in the morning and the first thing I wanted to take care of was the laundry. I feel like Laundry takes the longest to do and the whole outfit I wanted to wear was in my pile of filth. So it was definitely a priority to get that shit done real quick! the only thing was that I didn’t  have any damn quarters!!! And it wasn’t like I could just cross the street, roll up in either of the two gas stations available to me and ask for some damn quarters. Not only do they make you buy something, which, I mean is fine, but they also give exact change and refuse to break up your money, if they can help it. My best bet was to go to a respectable supermarket, buy something of course, and when I use my debit card and get that cash back question, HOPE that there’s a “Quarters” button I can press.
So, here I am walking a mile and half to Food Lion just to find out whether or not I’ll get some quarters, so I can finally do my laundry and have clean clothes to wear, so I can look somewhat attractive for New Years when I go out, to (hopefully) snatch someone up and get a goddamn kiss and some fuckin’ action in general!! It’s a big deal, ya know?
But the walk was fine. and I needed to do a little grocery shopping anyway. I needed some liquor and wine, so it wasn’t like the journey to the store was a bit of a setback or anything. I was just checking things off the list out of order, that’s all.
But it all went well. I got my little $10 roll of quarters, my liquor, my juice box wine and I was ready!
Doing the laundry wasn’t even all that bad. Of course waiting for the shit to go through all the cycles and put them in the dryer and then wait for that to get done was boring, but I had my juice box wine to keep me company, I planned ahead.
My clothes and sheets didn’t dry all the way through though, but I didn’t want to pay another damn dollar with my hard-earned quarters, so I decided to just let them air dry in the room.
Shit was everywhere.
At this point, it was getting late anyway and I really needed to transition from cleaning up the room to cleaning up myself. I had gotten a hair cut and needed to wash out all the leftover hair that was on me, I needed to shave my body in case I were to get some,  shave my face, so it would feel as irresistibly kissable as it’d look, clip the nails, lotion the body, throw on some makeup, all the while trying to keeping up a nice state of intoxication. These type of things just take time, ya know?
Eventually, I made it out of the shower and got all sexified. I was feelin’ and lookin’ GOOD!
 I even had time to spare, so I got a bit creative so I can show a loved one he was on my mind and just let him know I was about to get very sloshed.
Later, I finally linked up with my friends and we called a cab to come get us and take us to Pulse Ultra Club.
We got in right when the ball dropped. While everyone else were making out or giving each other blow jobs in the bathroom, I was paying my cover charge. It wasn’t necessarily how I pictured my first New Years out to be, but the one person I would’ve wanted to kiss wasn’t able to make it anyway, so it’s all good, I guess.  It was my first New Years celebrating with my friends instead of praying into the New Year with family and the rest of the congregation at church, so I was pretty excited. The Club was packed, I had never seen so many people in this closet sized club. Like, body on body packed, I couldn’t even twist and twirl like I wanted without slapping someone and giving them a concussion; But, you know, that was all right. It was a great way to bump and grind on people, whether they wanted to or not, they had no choice! I was able to find people that willingly wanted to dance with me too though.
Really, it was just an ordinary night. Fun, but nothing too eventful happened, like a fight, or a friend running off with a creeper, or someone being so drunk to the point that they get kicked out. Which is weird, because looking back, I was sure I was gonna be SO drunk by the time I got to the club, because I had been drinking all day and I had a 1ltr bottle of Jack and coke that I had intended to share with my friends, but since my mixes tend to be on the strong side, no one wanted any. And hunny, I was not letting that shit go to waste.
By the time we got home t my friend’s place, all that was on our mind was food. We scanned the fridge, the pantry, the freezer, the garbage can and we managed to rack up something, but it was really nothing. we were working with the dust and crumbs from a bag of chips. However, thank God a friend we had invited over came with a tray of onion rings and a burger. It was definitely our saving grace, we passed that shit around the room like it was a bowl of weed. Then everyone went home to pass out.
This morning when I woke up though, my whole body and head ached so hard, I felt like I must’ve killed myself a little last night. Which is fine, that usually is a sign one’s had a good time.
Hope you have a hangover too!


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