Today’s zero to hero challenge is to write about what’s on our minds. I’m not necessarily sure if this post completely follows the guidelines and whatnot, but hunny, it’s definitely something on my mind!
So yesterday (4 jan 2014), I went with my friend to go get her North-face jacket she had forgotten in the club when we went out for New Years. She also offered to take me to the mall, so I could drop off an application at one of the retail stores there. A couple days prior, when I went into the store to ask whether they were hiring or not, the manager at the time had said that they were constantly hiring and looking for good people. Hunny, I’m both! I’m all that shit and then some!
When employers say that they’re constantly hiring, it does make me wonder a bit about how the dynamic in that workplace is. Do people get fired allot? Are the workers there so miserable, that they quit as soon as they see what they’re dealing with? Is the pay that shitty!?! – my initial thoughts.
However, since my options are very narrow, and I’m desperate as fuck right now, I’ll settle for anything to make ends meet.
So yeah, since it sounded like this employer was just as thirsty as I am, I walked into that store with my application, feeling like these people were gonna go down on their knees and thank me for even considering gracing them with my presence and abilities… Well hunny, needles to say, that feeling went away real quick. There was a completely different manager working that day, and she ripped the application out of my hand, and my self worth right along with it, when she told me that she would put me on file, because they weren’t hiring anyone until the spring…
Hunny, where’s the other manager? I wanna give my application to her, because she said you’re always hiring. So, do I have reason to believe you’re lying or what’s going on here? I don’t understand…
Of course I played it as cool as I possibly could after having my soul crushed in front of care free, preppy, middle school girls, that were giving me the death-stare, because I was standing at the register having my hopes demolished and devoured (once again), when all these girls wanted to do was just pay for their new accessories with the Christmas money they just got.
THANK GOD my friend was with me to offer emotional support, because if I were by myself, I would’ve went straight home and sulked in despair. But no, we turned the rest of the day into a job hunting day. We went into every store I could imagine myself working in, and asked whether they were hiring. All of them, like, EVERY SINGLE ONE said some form of “We’re not hiring right now, but you can put in an application for us to keep it on File”
Hunny I swear, I heard those words so many times that day, that I was willing to pay people to not give me that.
By the end of the day though, we did come across a store that was starting its hiring process in the beginning of February (hopefully, as in the 1st dammit!), which for me, isn’t any better, but I’ll take it. If that doesn’t work out, I can always turn to the more frowned upon low life professions, but you know, I still have self worth and respect for myself and shit.
I also just feel like I’m so close, ya know? All of this rejection and disappointment, it does get to me and bother me and upset me, but at the same time, it really drives me, keeps me from getting comfortable, and constantly challenges me to tackle a situation from a different angle. Take a new approach. It even gives me a sec to think about whether I tried hard enough and did all I could. If I didn’t, did I really want it and so on and so forth.
This may be a bit of a bitch of me to say, but hunny, I always get what I want! And right now, I want a damn job! And I know I’ll land one.
I’ll totally keep ya posted on my progress (and epic fails) though!