“adieu”

Hunny, I can’t wait to reach that point in my life where everything is looking good! My body, my bills, my bank account, my job, the lives of my friends, my man and most importantly, my emotions. Or the control thereof.

It’s like, no matter how fabulous your life may be (as far as materialism and social status is concerned), if something is going on in your life that’s making you feel some type of shitty way, all of a sudden the whole world seems shitty and annoying!

I’m having a bit of a guilty conscience about putting someone on the silent treatment. I’ve spoken PLENTY of times about why I’m upset with him before. Given that he only has a few more days here in the US and seems to really want to see and talk to me before his departure, yeah, I feel like I’m on a kill-all-Jews-against-my-will status. Like, I feel pretty bad ya know?

At the same time though, subjectively thinking (or objectively, I don’t fucking know), I feel like it’s best to remain silent.

There have been times when I’ve messed up, or was not brave and daring enough, and at the end of the day, when I was all alone with my thoughts, I was haunted by the question…

If anything this guy said was really true and as important to him as he made it seem to be, then I hope that this question, along with everything else I’ve ever tried to help him realize, brews in his head. I’m not trying to say I know how the world works or anything, but if wisdom won’t do it for you, hopefully the struggle of navigating through the unknown – being left in the dark – will.

  • Learn from mistakes and experiences.
  • Stop trying to fix every issue on the outside and figure out what improvements could be made on the inside.
  • Leave your comfort zone. As far as I know, the most respected and influential people known to man have never lived comfortable lives.
  • Do not question the integrity of  friends and family. When it comes to touchy subject matters, they should be the ones you turn to for comfort and to confide in. If not, respectfully bid them adieu and cut them the fuck out of your life.

Hopefully this all makes sense. No matter how hurt or mad I may be, I never try to react in a way that I may regret later down the road. It’s not my intention to be mean, but some situations call for tough love, even if that means never speaking to that person ever again.

Thanks for reading

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Hunny, tell me 'bout it!

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