I had a very pleasant run in with one of my old residents one evening when I was at a bar trying to get fucked up, longing to forget about life’s struggles for a moment. There I was at the bar, trying to get the bartender to notice little black ol’ me, when this tall burly dude approaches me with a “HEY!” and the biggest smile on his face. I don’t know many tall burly dudes, so of course I was a little taken aback.
“Do you remember me?” he, said and all I did was smile and stare. Once I got passed all the beard on his face, I realized it was a kid I used to be the Resident Assistant for during his freshman year of college. Obviously he looked more grown, as it’s been a while since he was a freshman. I was so surprised to see him with a PBR in his hand, and in a public bar for that matter. I was having one of those moments a lot of parents have, where they think their child just never grows up and are too innocent to ever drink, smoke and fuck other people.
After I got over the whole “who the fuck are you?!” thing and remembered who he was, this dude brought all of his tall glory down to my level and whispered in my ear “Thank you for being my RA”.
I did not see that one coming! Let alone the fact that he noticed, approached and spoke to me with a smile on his face. He told me something along the lines of me changing his life for the better. Or at least his views on things that are different from what he was raised to believe.
I forget where the guy comes from, but from what he was telling me, he was raised in bumpkin/hick central. Just to get to the point, he told me he was very hostile/anti towards homosexuals and black people, and Hunny, with me being his RA, he got that whole shit show wrapped in one, AND I was in charge over his life. However, he said I was very chill and allowed him and his roommates the freedom they had hoped for when they first came to college.
Like, c’mon, as if I didn’t know that most college freshman when they first come to school solely plan to drink, fuck and do drugs. As a senior at the time, I was VERY aware of this, so going into that year as a seasoned RA, my only rule basically was:
Like, it’s not that hard.
I was mostly beyond the point of return myself, when it came to turning up. Don’t get in my way and I won’t ruin your college life. Hunny, Lord knows I did my best as a college RA to throw a kid in J Reuben, if they got in my way!
Obviously, that never happened with this kid and later on in his college life he realized other RAs weren’t as cool as I was. Despite how gay and black I was, I wasn’t in his face about it. I really liked when he said that because of me, he’s currently dating a black girl and loves what they got goin’ on!
I de-homophobed a man AND got him down with the brown!
Apparently, because that guy was “exposed” to the likes of me, he realized that at the end of the day, gay guys are just guys as well. We’re not (always) out to convert random straight men, and we’re out there in the world simply trying to live our lives, just like anybody else.
Or, how he put it: “We’re ALL just trying to get our dick wet, and it shouldn’t matter who does it!”
Thanks for reading!